I think I'll nurse Liam until he's 6.

My stepmom was pulling her usual crap tonight when I went to pick Liam up, and giving me a hard time about him still nursing. She's not his favorite person, and she thinks it's because she's been the bad guy who takes him away from nursing. But that's not the issue - the issue is that she's the bad guy who's authoritarian and needlessly controlling. I think she'd like to be able to blame it all on nursing, so me pointing out that it's not the issue just escalated the argument we were having. Grrr.

Liam had a very nice stay with the grandparents, and had an utter blast in the pool. He slept really well for them, sleeping in both mornings that they had him. My stepmother, of course, is insisting this is because he wants his own space/room. Which might very well help him sleep longer - Eric and I have been talking about how we want to manage that transition. But it's equally likely that it was caused by other factors like a) a darker sleeping environment, b) only napping for an hour each day or c) being in the pool three times a day!

But in the actual nursing and weaning news, I ended up pumping tonight. Liam asked to nurse a little while after I arrived to pick him up, but I told him he needed to wait until bedtime. Then at bedtime, he was busy doing other things, and when Eric asked him if he wanted to go upstairs to read books with daddy, he didn't insist on nursing mommy first. He said the words "nursing mommy" when he was putting his animals to bed, but that didn't seem to translate to wanting it from me, so I didn't offer, and off we all went to read books. But I was definitely feeling a little bit of pressure (it was interesting how I could notice my milk production kicking up just being near Liam and snuggling him in my lap) so I pulled out the pump to take off the edge.

I don't know what I should do when he asks to nurse in the morning. I think I'll nurse him, because I don't want to just all of a sudden be done nursing - I'd like to savor that last snuggly time or two. But I'm thinking it's time to cut out the nighttime/bedtime nursing session as the next step.
Liam is sleeping much better since we had daycare cut back on his nap. We're still not getting quite as much morning sleep as we might like, but he's gone from waking up around 4:45-5 am to 5:45-6:15 am. Sometimes even later. And bedtime has gotten much, much easier - he's going to sleep like a dream now. We'll continue to see how thing are settling out, and perhaps ask daycare to cut back even farther, down to 1.5 hours.

I'm still kind of conflicted about weaning, but we are continuing on with our program of cutting back. I figure I can stop anywhere short of actually weaning if I decide one of us isn't ready... It has been easier than I expected. This weekend we cut out the naptime nursing, and though he asked a couple of times, he didn't get upset when I said no. The first day he was satisfied with an extra book, and the second day he didn't even need that. This is the kid who at daycare walks into the nap room, lies down on his nap pad and is out like a light, so clearly he's capable of going to sleep without nursing, he just needed to translate that skill to home.

Morning will probably be next to go, and perhaps starting earlier than I had expected - this morning he woke up earlier than our accepted nursing time (6 am) and I told him he needed to lie back down and try to sleep, and we'd nurse in a little while. But he was very awake and clearly ready to get up, and when he gave up asking to nurse and just asked for a cup of milk instead, I decided to go with the flow and get up and do that instead. When we were heading down the stairs he said "I nursin mommy?" and I paused and reminded him that he had decided we should go downstairs and get milk instead of nursing. He nodded quite happily, and hasn't asked again since we've been downstairs.

The hardest part has been that he still asks fairly regularly at "off" times. He's never raised the slightest fuss when I remind him that we won't nurse again until bedtime, and is happy with a snuggle instead. So it seems like a good time to be doing this, but I still worry a little that I'm cutting him off prematurely and not meeting whatever need nursing fulfills for him. We'll continue on our slow and steady course and see what happens.
So surprisingly, dropping the extra nursing sessions has gone much easier than I expected. He asks, but I tell him "no, we'll nurse again at bedtime, let's do this other thing instead" and he rarely even asks again, let alone raises a fuss. Which leads me to think that he may very well be ready for weaning. The question is, am I?

As much as I would be happy to not have to deal with a jabby sharp nailed finger in my belly button every morning, when faced with the prospect of actual real weaning I get a little melancholy even for that. Breastfeeding is a really special relationship. I'm unlikely to have any more children, so when we're done, that's it. I'll miss that special closeness with him, although I know we can make it up in other ways. Then there's the "lazy mom" factor. Right now if I'm trying to finish typing an email or LJ post, it's easy to distract Liam for a minute with nursing. If I'm just too tired to play, it's an easy way to satisfy his desire for attention. And there's nothing better for helping him calm down from a painful boo-boo. Parenting without nursing will be harder.

On the plus side, it would sure be nice not to have to lug my breastpump around the country when I travel. And he's started biting again, which I am so done with.

I decided that last weekend we would still nurse for naps, but I let him know that starting this upcoming weekend, we wouldn't be nursing at naptime anymore. So that's the next step, unless we decide to speed up the program. Eric thinks that dropping the bedtime nursing session wouldn't be a big deal at all - there are many nights that he skips that now, if I'm out at a meeting or with friends or something. He thinks morning will be hardest. And while it's true that the first words out of Liam's mouth every morning are "I nursin mommy?," I think so long as I was willing to spring up out of bed and take him downstairs to watch one of his shows, that he'd be okay with that disappearing too. Although, gak, the thought of springing up out of bed at 5 or 6 am is a rough one.

Thoughts from the peanut gallery?
I haven't slept well in the last two weeks. Not because Liam is waking me up at night - he mostly sleeps through now, and we stopped nursing at night months ago - just because I'm not a good sleeper. Never have been really. But two weeks of restless nights is getting to be a bit much, and I think I need to starting thinking about going back on Trazodone[1]. Which is not really compatible with breastfeeding - in extreme circumstances it's considered acceptable (as are most SSRI's) but I'd prefer to not mess with Liam's brain chemistry.

And while there are times that nursing is a wonderful close warm bonding experience for both of us, much of the time it's become a battle against wandering hands, pinching fingers, kicking feet, and a little boy who pretends he's Cookie Monster while nursing, gets distracted, and pops off and on.

So yeah, time to think about weaning. We've got two times a day that we almost always nurse - first thing in the morning and as part of Liam's bedtime routine. We occasionally nurse other times too. Seems like a good first step would be to cut back to just those two times, in their specified places (bed in the morning, the chair in the evening) and cut out the extras. This will be relatively easy during the week, when our time together is limited, but will be more challenging on weekends. Especially since right now naptime on weekends is the only time that Liam still nurses to sleep. But if we can do that for a couple of weeks, then we can think about cutting out one or both of the others. I think going cold turkey would just cause us a lot of unnecessary pain, so we'll try a slower approach to start.

I always said that we'd stop nursing when either one of us thought it was time to be done. I'm all in favor of child-led weaning, but only if Mom's okay with that too - nursing is a partnership, after all.

[1] Trazodone is an anti-depressent, frequently prescribed for insomnia at doses that are sub-therapeutic for depression. Unlike something like Ambien, it's non-habit forming so can be taken every day - important for me, as when I tried Ambien I found myself wanting/needing to take it much more often than suggested. At a 50 mg dose it makes it easier for me to both fall asleep and fall back asleep. I still wake up after 5 hours, but I can go back to sleep after that. At the 100 mg dose it gives me panic attacks and incredibly bizarre and vivid dreams, so more is NOT better. I tried a bunch of natural alternatives before finally going over to the medical side of things, and I was very pleased with the results. I stopped taking it almost three years ago when I found myself pregnant.
Eric was putting Liam to bed tonight. His bedtime ritual includes listening to music, usually lullaby CDs, or something classical. Tonight, after Eric thought Liam was asleep, he got up and did his usual routine of turning the music down, then off. And a little sleepy voice piped up from the bed "music? music?" Eric turned the music back on and waited a few minutes, not wanting to open the door and wake him up further. Liam started breathing deeply and making his little sleeping sounds, so again Eric tried to turn off the music. "Music? Music?" At that point Eric decided to just leave the music on and get out while the getting was good. When he opened the door to leave, a sleepy little voice said "Bye bye." Awww - too sweet.

Our little baby is definitely growing up. Since we started the new bedtime routine, a couple of nights a week he just wants to skip nursing and go straight upstairs to read books with daddy. This has its good side and bad side - good for me and Liam's eventual weaning, but bad for Eric, as Liam is more hyper and restless if he hasn't had a little mellow nursing time with mom. Even when he does nurse, though, it's almost always pretty short in duration.

With spring coming, we're also working on dropping the daycare pickup nursing session. This is one that I'd particularly like to get rid of, because to get to daycare in time to nurse him before they kick us out at 5:30, I have to rush out of work at about 4:50 every day. And if I get there late and there isn't time to nurse before 5:30, I end up either nursing him in the car or having to force a crying tantrumy boy into his carseat, which is no fun for either of us. But on days that are warm, they are outside at pickup time, and Liam has no problem with going from outside directly to the car without a nursing session in between. So once the weather is consistently good, dropping that one will be a piece of cake. That might also be a good time to institute a general rule that we only nurse at home in our designated nursing places (the nursing chair or in bed), but I have to give that one some more thought.
A couple nights this week Liam has been busy playing and hasn't wanted to take a bath as part of his bedtime routine. He's got dry winter skin, so it's just as well by us, and we let him play for a while extra instead. Tonight was one of those nights. When he was done playing (making dinner for mommy and daddy at his kitchen - pizza and cakies again), he was asking to nurse. But nursing is the last thing we do before he goes upstairs to read with Daddy, so I insisted that he get his pajamas on and brush his teeth instead. He put up a huge fuss about it all, at least until I took his socks off with my teeth, making him laugh, after which it got much better. We read a book while daddy brushed his teeth, and he liked the book so much he wanted to read it again. And again. And then he wanted to read his Elmo book.

"Liam," I said, "If you want to nurse before bed, we need to take a pillow over to the nursing chair." I didn't want him to read books for 15 minute and then decide that he wanted to nurse, pushing bedtime back.

"No," he said, patting the couch. "[this] chair."

"We don't nurse on the couch, Liam. We nurse in the nursing chair. So we can go nurse in the chair, or you can go upstairs and read books with daddy," I said. And, lo and behold, he went into the den, grabbed Eric by the hand and walked over to the stairs saying "Books."

He gave me a kiss goodnight, waved "Bye-bye, mama" and off they went. Such a big boy now.
Liam must have some teeth coming through right now, because he's been biting like crazy. Biting me, biting his dad, biting himself, biting pillows, blankets, you name it. And yes, biting nipples. Yesterday he bit my nipple in a particularly nasty fashion. Ouch! It hurts to nurse him from that side now, so I've been nursing the other side. But now that side hurts from engorgement too, from not having emptied in so long. Talk about a double whammy!


Feb. 9th, 2006 08:13 pm
Today Liam was interpersing nursing with playing with some stuffed toys. Then he got this brilliant idea to combine the two and one by one, each stuffed toy got a chance to nurse from mom too. Kitties, bunnies, dinosaurs, penguins.

Oh teh cute.
So my recent posts about my stepmom and the whole weaning thing have been percolating in my mind, and I thought I'd note a couple of other bits.

Extended nursing isn't about nutrition. Sure, there are some calories, vitamins and minerals, immunological benefits. But those are just side effects. If Liam is hungry, he'll ask for a cracker or some cheese. If he's thirsty, he'll ask for some water or juice. If he wants comfort and connection and closeness, he'll ask to nurse. Put yourself inside a toddler's head for a moment, and you'll see that nursing is a comfort unilke any other comfort. It's rooted deep in biology - the drive to nurse is what's kept him alive. It's been a constant from the very beginning. It triggers hormonal releases that relax and calm. It's an entire sensory experience - smells, tastes, feeling of skin on skin - all things that drive us in our physical relationships as adults. People who have never nursed a child, or nursed one into toddlerhood, probably don't realize this, since the popular culture just thinks of breastfeeding as a different baby bottle, if they think of it at all.

When my stepmom tried to insist that I should unceremoniously cut him off, when he could and was asking for it, the idea of doing it struck me as such a violent act. Yet we have recently forced nightweaning on him, when he would certainly have preferred the status quo to remain. Why does the one bother me, but the other does not? The nursing at night was incurring great costs on all of us - sleep deprivation, and the degradation of parenting ability that accompanies it, declining immune system performance. To force the issue had its own costs, but on the balance, nightweaning was the clear winner. But nursing him the rest of the time costs me very little, if anything at all. As the last two weekends have shown, I'm not chained to him - he can and does go without nursing when I'm not around. When we're together, it's an enjoyable thing for both of us - it's one of the few times where he's even remotely still while being held, and I can smell his baby smell and stroke his baby skin. As long as we're both okay with it, what reasons would we have for stopping?
Figured I should give this its own new post, rather than responding to almost everybody who commented on the my last post.

I was pretty surprised that my stepmom was as rude as she was, actually. She's been quite supportive of me breastfeeding up until this point, and has shown quite a willingness to learn. I was really worried about her when I was pregnant, actually. Everytime I said anything about planning to breastfeed, she'd immediately say "But you shouldn't count on it. Neither A or J were able to breastfeed. Don't get your heart set on it." (A is my sister and J is my sister-in-law.) Then she came to help after my c-section, and saw what *real* breastfeeding problems looked like (Liam was tongue-tied and didn't latch) and that because I had good information, the right kinds of help, and a strong will to succeed, I was able to make it work. (While I'm aware that even those three things aren't always enough, the problems A and J had were not major, and at least in A's case, she clearly received bad information or didn't follow the good information.)

But while she was here she learned a ton about breastfeeding. She read the entire breastfeeding section of The Baby Book. She shared her own experiences: she wanted to breastfeed her own children, but her abusive ex-husband wouldn't let her, although she did get to nurse the youngest for a short time.

So knowing all this, I was shocked by the strength of her opposition. And that's why I think sending an email wouldn't necessarily be a bad thing. Clearly extended nursing is as outside of her experience as successful initiation of nursing was when Liam was born, and some education might have the same result as it did last time.
Thanks to everyone for the kind birthday wishes!

It was an okay day. I woke up too early when my increasing head, throat and chest congestion would no longer let me sleep. Also, I think my body is just used to waking up at 6:30 now, which was 5:30 today, of course. I'll be going to bed very soon to make up for it.

But I took advantage of my early rising to catch up on TV shows, and finish one of the books I'd been reading, so all was not lost.

Late morning, Eric and I headed out to Davison to spend the day with Liam and my parents at their trailer. He was still napping when we arrived, so Eric, my Dad and I went off to play mini golf. Which was a very fun birthday activity, especially since they were loudly broadcasting an 80's music countdown in the background. Eric and I tied, and since I had a hole in one and he didn't, I declared myself the winner.

As we were walking back to the campsite, my stepmom and Liam were walking out to meet us, and Liam came running up to us - very excited to see us, but not upset like he was last week. So that was nice. The only bad thing was that I almost immediately had a little kerfuffle with my stepmom when Liam asked to nurse and I let him - "It's been three days and he hasn't nursed. Obviously he doesn't need it. He's old enough to ask for it, so he doesn't need it. *You're* the one who's not ready to wean." She's right - I'm not ready to lead a weaning effort - if Liam stopped nursing, I'd be fine with it, but the strongest position I'm willing to take at this point in his development is "don't offer, don't refuse." I'm not going to impose full weaning on him, especially while he's still not entirely adjusted to the nightweaning we just imposed on him. And the whole "if he's old enough to ask for it" argument is so ridiculous! He's old enough to ask for a cracker - does that mean we shouldn't give it to him? Why is nursing the one thing where we're supposed to punish effective communication? Not to mention that he's been able to "ask for it" since he was born - his body language has always made it clear when he wanted to nurse. My sister's son had a bottle at bedtime until he was 2 1/2 - I bet no one was telling her that he shouldn't have it because he could ask for it!!! Grrr. "He's going to be four and still nursing," she said. Fine. I think we'll be done before then, but I'm not setting some arbitrary limit.

To make the whole situation even more frustrating, I still have laryngitis, so wasn't able to say any of the above to defend myself. I may send her an email with some of the salient points. Or I may just decide it's not worth the bother.

Other than that it was a nice visit. We took Liam up to the indoor heated pool to go swimming, and I got to soak in the hot tub for a while. Had a nice dinner of pork loin roasted with potatoes and carrots, with gravy and salad and corn muffins. Yum. And then it was time to come home. I shouldn't be posting, I should be sleeping, but I had to get the rant out or it was going to keep me up all night. I wanted to rant to Eric in the car, but I just can't talk that much. :-(
Liam's nap this afternoon was a little late because of my eyeglass emergency. He was having a really hard time, and wanted to nurse a lot, and very vigorously. He'd fall asleep nursing, but with absolute death grip suction on my nipple. If I tried to delatch him to get him into the pack-n-play, then he'd wake up and cry. I didn't want to bring him into our bed, because he was covered in sand and suntan lotion. I couldn't nurse him to sleep on the bed in his room, because it's raised and he could fall off. What to do?

I ended up lying on the floor and nursing him to sleep there, and waiting until he was asleep enough to slip away. I'm sure he was mighty confused when he woke up!!!

In other sleep news, he did not insist on nursing to sleep tonight and instead let me walk him down, although that took quite a long time. A few minutes ago he gave a wake up wail or two, but put himself back asleep before Eric got to the stairs. So that gives me hope for tonight.
As you may recall, last week I wrote about getting a plugged duct after I started sending cow's milk with Liam to daycare and stupidly decided to skip my pumping session on Tuesday. Things went from bad to worse and better again as the weekend wore on.

I discovered the plugged duct on Wednesday. So at bedtime Wednesday night I had Liam nurse only from the clogged side, hoping that would relieve it. He nursed for a long time that night, and it hurt. But plugged ducts hurt, and I figured that's all it was. The next day nursing hurt even more, even though it seemed the clog had cleared, so I was very confused.

Remember how a while ago I talked about how Liam's new teeth were pressing up against my breast during nursing, and that was making nursing quite uncomfortable? Well, turns out that the discomfort I was feeling when he was nursing Wednesday night wasn't just the plugged duct, it was also the teeth. By Thursday morning I had a little open wound right next to the nipple, and whenever Liam would latch on it would hurt so much. But I was afraid of getting another plugged duct, so I had to keep nursing him regardless.

Over the weekend I tried to manage it as best I could. I used Lanisnoh nipple appointment between nursings to help with healing. I nursed him more frequently on my good side, and less frequently on the hurt side, while pumping the hurt side a couple times a day to make sure I was emptying it of milk. I had him nurse in all sorts of different positions. The most comfortable is him upside down - usually when we nurse lying down we're facing tummy to tummy. But if I flip him upside down (so that his feet are pointing at my head), then it doesn't hurt at all. But obviously that's not a position I can use out at a restaurant or something, you know?

By Saturday I'd stopped chanting "ow, ow, ow, ow" throughout the entire nursing session, so I do seem to be on the mend.

While Liam and I had our own set of nursing problems in the beginning, I realize how lucky I was now in that I never had any issues with thrush, or cracked or sore nipples. In fact, because of our particular problems (couldn't latch without a nipple shield) I was actually protected from the usual new mom nipple pain.


Jun. 15th, 2005 08:15 pm
I'm down to only one pumping session a day at work, usually getting just 3-4 ounces of milk. Even one session disrupts my day, and there's all the ferrying of pump parts back and forth etc, so I've been working on transitioning Liam to cow's milk for daycare. At this point there's really no reason for me to pump anymore - he's taking the breastmilk/cow's milk mixture well, so I could just start sending cow's milk and he'd be fine. So yesterday I got busy at work and skipped my pumping sesison.

Bad idea. I was engorged at the end of the day, but not horribly so. Today, however, I have a clogged milk duct, which hurts a little bit all the time, and makes nursing that side exquisitely painful, especially at letdown. Of course, the main cure for a clogged milk duct is to nurse as much as possible on that side. Ouch.

So I'll definitely be letting Liam nurse as often as he wants tonight, that's for sure.
The follow on to my earlier "sleeping babies" post.

So, I've been thinking about how long Liam and I are going to keep doing this nursing thing. I'm a definite supporter of child led weaning as an ideal. But I don't think I'm going to be able to live up to that ideal. And for the most part I'm okay with that. I love seeing and hearing about the nursing toddlers in our community, but I have to acknowledge that I just don't think I have the temperment to support it.

Eric and I are going away to Chicago for my birthday in October, and Liam will be staying with my parents for the weekend. The trip will be easier for all of us if he's night-weaned by then. Lately the night nursing has been getting harder and harder on me - I can't fall asleep while he's nursing, it takes me a long time to fall asleep after he's done nursing, and if it's a bad night, I get hardly any sleep before he's up again.

But nightweaning is going to be difficult. All of my attempts to otherwise help him back to sleep in the middle of the night have been largely ineffective. He's used to latching on before he even totally wakes up. If I'm not there to nurse or don't want to nurse him, he ends up waking up fully and needing more intensive effort to resettle. And even though I'm not sleeping when he's nursing, at least I'm lying down in bed instead of having to walk him around or something, where I'd wake up even more. There's a (hopefully) short period of time where things have to get worse in terms of sleepless nights before they get better, and I haven't been willing to go there yet. I was also hoping that we could wait until his verbal skills would allow him to potentially understand things like "no nursing until it's light outside," but he's not particularly precocious verbally, so that's probably still months away.

And then there's this - now that he's got top teeth, nursing is getting more uncomfortable. Sometimes he bites me - especially lately when he's been actively teething. Other times he whips his head around while still latched on, and scrapes my nipple with his teeth. But even more annoyingly (and not his fault), it's just that I can feel the pressure from his upper teeth all the time. And they're pointy little teeth, so that's often kinda painful. Not the sharp pain of a bite, but just a slight edge of pain that lasts for the entire nursing session and might actually be worse than the occasional bite. Liam does have a small mouth, and I think he doesn't/isn't able to open his mouth large enough to get a latch that's going to be comfortable.

If I'm dreading every nursing session because it hurts, that's not a good thing for a healthy, happy nursing relationship. But Liam loves to nurse, and up until recently I've quite enjoyed nursing him, so it's hard to contemplate stopping because of a little discomfort. Advice from moms on my list who've been there would be helpful.
Liam is on my lap nursing, sippy cup in one hand and a pen in the other. Every couple of minutes he pops off the breast, takes a sip of water, and then latches back on. Silly boy.

Got Milk?

May. 16th, 2005 01:52 pm
I think the time is coming to start transitioning Liam to cow's milk or water for his daytime liquid consumption at daycare. He's clearly nursing a lot less than he used to, and my body is showing it. I can go much longer now without getting that full sensation that reminds me to pump. I nursed him this morning around 8, I guess, and just pumped now, almost 6 hours later. I only got 3 ounces, and comfort-wise, I expect I could easily have made it through to the end of the day.

One day last week I went about 7 hours, when I experienced the pumping equivalent of not being able to get it up. I was out, and because of timing of various things, ended up trying to pump in a public bathroom, while standing in front of the only working paper towel dispenser, and directly under a fan blowing cold air. I hooked up the horns, leaned up against the counter, and tried to relax. Nothing happened. People came and went, and nothing continued to happen. I just couldn't get a letdown! An older woman came up to me and started talking about breastfeeding her kids back when hardly anyone breastfed, and what that was like, and her daughter who pumps for her baby. Hooray, I thought - surely the distraction of talking about babies will help my body do what it needs to. Nope. Eventually I just gave up, and it took a while for me to get a chance to try again, thus the whole 7 hour thing.

Unfortunately, I may have missed my ideal window for making the transition. There was a period a few weeks ago when he was down to just one bottle per day, but I kept sending extra milk just in case, and recently he's started taking two bottles again. Oh well - he's such an easy going little guy, I'm sure he'll manage just fine.

I'm happy to continue to nurse him when we're together, it's just the pumping that I'd be pleased to do without.
After a couple of busy weekends, Eric and I had very little planned for this past one. Friday night saw our first grilling of the season - cheeseburgers, served with steamed broccoli, salad and oven fries.

Saturday I took Liam to his friend Maya's first birthday party, and while we were out of the house Eric got a start on changing the fish tanks. Saturday night we got together with Scott and Sue for our second grilling of the season - asparagus, zucchini, portabellas, salmon, and some pan roasted potatoes. Yum. We had intentions to play a game together, but Liam continued his recent trend of not falling asleep easily at night, so instead we just had strawberry shortcake and came home.

Sunday more fish tanks were cleaned, and we tackled one of our long list of organizational tasks - organizing the utensil drawers in the kitchen. All the other drawers and cabinets also need organization, but there's only so much you can do during one baby nap. We met up with [livejournal.com profile] netmouse and [livejournal.com profile] murphyw for dinner at Shalimar - it was nice to see them, and nice to go out. Liam was an absolute joy - he was the cheeriest I've ever seen him. After dinner we walked around downtown a little bit, stopping into Afterwords, and the Sweetwaters so Eric could get a cappucino. To go, as we had to get the baby home to bed. Picked up a bunch of books for Liam at Afterwords - at $2.98 each, it's hard to resist. In three of them the artwork is paintings by famous artists - we got A Magical Day with Matisse, Dancing with Degas, and A Picnic with Monet. Alas, there were no copies of In the Garden wth Van Gogh (referenced on the back of the other books). But still - neat! We also got a Touch and Feel bedtime book, because he likes those a lot, and then a neat little book called Grow Up!. Each page has a different baby animal and a peekaboo window - what does a kitten grow up to be? And then you turn the page with the peekaboo window and there's a cat! Etc. The last page of course has a baby growing up to be "me!" with a little mirror. Very clever - I think Liam will like it a lot.

All of the excitment may have been too much for Liam, though. He insisted on nursing for a long, long time when we went to bed (I didn't succeed in unlatching him until close to midnight, I think). And then around 2 he woke up but didn't want to nurse. I managed to settle him by patting his back, but just a few minutes later he woke up again and barfed all over the bed. Nice thing about cosleeping - I was able to pull him out of it and settle him before he even had time to get upset. Bad thing about cosleeping - having to change the sheets on a king size bed in the middle of the night. He managed to settle down and go back to sleep really easily, but both Eric and I lied awake for a long time. I think I finally got to sleep around 3:30. Luckily, Liam slept well after that. Even when he woke up he didn't want to nurse, so it was fairly easy to settle him with just a hand on the back. Left me awfully engorged this morning, though.

Just like with a fever, he can't got to daycare if he's been vomited within 24 hours, so I'm home with him today. But I'd already arranged to give a neighbor a ride into work today, so after Liam woke up (he slept in for a while) I loaded him into the car, dropped Katie off, and took him into the office. Figured I'd grab some work to bring home. But I realized that the main thing I needed to do was get a mailing out the door, so I figured I'd see how much I could get done before he got too unhappy. He was really good - I got quite a bit done, and then when I was about to give up, I found someone to play with him and give me the extra 20 minutes I needed. (One of my coworker's adult daughters was visiting for a while before heading to the airport and was happy to play with him.)

All of the excitement meant he missed his usual morning nap, but he feel asleep the *instant* I put him in his car seat to come home. Luckily he's gotten really good at staying asleep from the car to the house, so I was able to put him in the pack-n-play, eat lunch, and compose this LJ post. Now I'd better go do some laundry before he wakes up!
He's started rejecting his bottles at daycare. Only drinking maybe an ounce in the morning and after lunch, and a few ounces in the afternoon. He only drank 7 of the 11 ounces I sent him with today. With 4 extra ounces that needed to be used up today, I figured I could take the evening off and have Eric put Liam to bed. But he only drank 3 of the 4 ounces, then didn't want anymore! And he's not cooperating with his Daddy putting him to sleep, despite being overtired from only getting one short nap today. He's not been cooperating very well at bedtime for me either, these last couple of nights. He's not falling asleep while nursing, as he usually does, and he's really resisting being held in any of his usual sleep inducing positions. He's a busy little guy these days, and I think he's figured out that these things make him go to sleep and he doesn't want any part of that sleep stuff! Don't we know he's got places to go and people to drool on? So something that used to take a pretty predictable 20-30 minutes is stretching out towards an hour. Ugh.

Oh well - at least the bottle situation is letting me get a little bit ahead on my milk stash. Although this came on so suddenly, I'm not sure how much to send with him tomorrow - I don't want him to suddenly decide he wants milk again and not have enough. He's only drank about 7 ounces each of the last two days, so I'm thinking I'll send 9 maybe. Tomorrow's a short day because of my facilitation training, and he's got a sippy cup and extra food in the freezer. I hate to send extra and then have to throw it away!

Right now Eric is attempting to lull him to sleep using his last remaining trick - sitting in front of the basement aquariums. Oh - he's just wandered past with a sleeping boy in his arms, so I guess that worked. Phew. So long as he can get him into bed without waking him up, that is. Ahh - success! Hooray dad!

Good Eats

Mar. 8th, 2005 08:26 pm
Oh, and in other news, the trip to the grocery store with the near miss car accident resulted in my spending $80 on groceries. Not so much money, you say, until you realize that it was all for Liam! I know it's got to be cheaper than buying jars - this much food is going to get us through the next couple of months, but damn it was a lot at once. Fresh: squash, sweet potatoes, pears, potatoes, onion, carrots, leeks (those last four for a couple of recipes I got from [livejournal.com profile] sueij), frozen: peaches, mango, green beans, peas, Other: ground beef, red lentils (again for the recipes), yogurt, cheese, whole wheat pasta, spaghetti sauce (I'll probably make this for lunch some day and then mush up the rest for him), applesauce. And this is on top of the kiwi and bananas I bought him yesterday. All organic. The boy is eating better now than he will for the rest of his life, I'm sure, but might as well get him off to a good start.

Of course, right now, with being sick, he's not really eating much at all, poor thing. And poor me, since it means he's nursing a lot more than usual. As I think I mentioned previously, having to use bottles for some of yesterday has my pumped milk stash depleted, which is a small problem since I'm going to be away tomorrow. It's the second session of my facilitation class, and I don't want to miss it, so Eric will be staying home with Liam, since he still has a fever and can't go to daycare. I've arranged for a ride from one of my neighbors so Eric can keep the car with the carseat and bring Liam to me for a lunch time nursing. And then I'll just have to be really diligent about pumping over the weekend to get enough stashed for Monday.



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